Happy not a ghost day!

It’s time to rhyme your birthday post
I think you’ll like this one the most
The reason I can make this boast
Is ’cause I am not yet a ghost
Since you are I are both still here
I wish you happiness and cheer
So have a drink of wine or beer
And I’ll be back this time next year


Bats fly when you’re having fun

At midnight tonight
My birthday month is over
Then it’s spooky time!


55 is the new 47

I’m still alive
At 55
Where will I be
At 63?
Will I be fine
At 69?
Will it be fun
At 81?
I just can’t wait
For 98!


The Boomtown Fats

The chocolate chips inside my mouth
Cause sugar overload
And nobody’s gonna send a text today
I’m gonna hide inside my home
And Brownie doesn’t understand it
I always eat till my belly’s swolled
And Linc can see no presents
‘Cause there are no presents
No presents for a man fully grown
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
My birthday suit don’t fit me now
Now, now, feel like a cow
Though it’s my birthday I’m feeling down right now
I’ve been eating cake for quite a while
I’ve swallowed too much and soon I’ll be learning
And the lesson today is don’t eat pie
And then the chip bag crackles and I have to tackle
Why I can’t see my feet or thighs
And I can see no presents
‘Cause there are no presents
Just candy wrappers piled up high, high, oh, oh oh!
And the chocolate chips inside my mouth
Cause sugar overload oh!
And nobody’s gonna send a text today
I’m gonna hide inside my home
And Brownie doesn’t understand it
I always eat till my belly’s swolled
And Linc can see no presents
‘Cause there are no presents
No presents for a man fully grown
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
(Makes me cry) I don’t like I don’t like
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
(Makes me cry) I don’t like I don’t like
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
(Makes me cry) I don’t like birthdays
My birthday suit don’t fit me now


Happy birthday today and every other day

Happy birthday
So nice to see
Happy birthday
It should be as good as can be
Oh happy birthday
Happy birthday make a wish for free
That on your birthday you will plant a money tree
Happy birthday
Have fun today
Happy birthday
I hope you just eat cake and play
Oh happy birthday
You’ll open your presents and party with glee
Oh happy birthday
I hope you sing this part with me
Every other day
Every other day
Every other day of the year is fine, yeah
But then when your birthday comes
But then when your birthday comes
You can find me rhymin’ all of the time
Happy birthday
Have fun today
Happy birthday
Don’t get carried away
Whoa, Happy birthday
Don’t go away
Happy birthday
It’s here to stay
Oh happy birthday
Oh happy birthday


Lately things they don’t seem the same

I’ve been in a haze
For four or five days
It’s been since the first
And just gotten worse
I’ve been close to tears
For four or five years
My eyes are a fount
When birthdays don’t count


Happy birthday Brownie!

A dog was born ten years ago
His fur is brown, like cookie dough
He isn’t bright, a little dense
His head is stupidly immense
He’d sell his soul to get a treat
But most of all that dog is sweet
I’ll sing him this, but he won’t care
Oh happy birthday Brownie Bear!


Merry birthday

‘Twas the night before birthday, and inside my place
Linc and Brownie are sitting in front of my face
I’m trying to watch Parks and Rec season two
But these selfish monsters are blocking my view
They don’t have a cake and not even one toy
But they want to be near a good little boy
Now Brownie, now Lincoln, if you’ll both sit still
We’ll give brand new meaning to Netflix and chill


Wish you were here

It’s time to celebrate your birth
A trip around the sun from Earth
It’s time for posts from friends and kin
And getting drunk with bathtub gin
I hope you get to raise some hell
And barring that, I hope it’s swell
So lift your glass and give a cheer
You’ve made it through another year!


Happy Birthday Linc!

I have a cat, his name is Linc
His fur is soft and black as ink
His claws are sharp, his butthole pink
Around the house he likes to slink
Then disappears before I blink
He thinks that Brownie is a fink
He likes to make his boxes stink
His antics push me to the brink
So, twice a month I see a shrink
That little shit drives me to drink


Happy 53 Sweetie Pea

If Sweetie Pea
Was here with me
She too would be 53
I shed a tear
‘Cause she’s not here
49 again this year


Birthday bear hugs

Happy birthday to Louise
You should do all that you please
Drink white wine, and eat sharp cheese
Teach the world like Socrates
Celebrate your expertise
Hope you get an ursine squeeze


Happy bastard’s birthday

There was a new mother named Mary
But Joseph’s son she did not carry
When asked by her guy
She made up a lie
Though pregnant she still had her cherry


The big five three

Today I’m 53
Big whoop-de-fuckin-dee
Although this year is hell
You’ve made my birthday swell
While I take birthday spanks
I give you many thanks!



It’s time for your annual partay
I wish I could be at your soirée
To prove that I care
This rhyme that is rare
Is only for you on your birthday


Happy birthday to my Sweetie Pea

My heart is locked, you have the key
That’s why you are my Sweetie Pea
We love to laugh, we’re filled with glee
This ring makes you my Sweetie Pea
The bestest smile, you’d ever see
So glad you are my Sweetie Pea
Though you are gone and not with me
You’ll always be my Sweetie Pea


So blow out the candles and have a piece of cake!

It’s my day of birth, but I ain’t new
Like a deck of cards I’m 52
To my Sweetie Pea I’m Sugar Pooh
I did not move here to eat lamb stew
Count ABC’s twice to get my age
I’m like a tiger trapped in a cage
But maybe this year I’ll turn the page
They say 50 plus is such a rage
Took 52 years to get this far
I walk everywhere ’cause I’ve no car
And my birthday wish is so bizarre
But I want to be a viral star
With my rocking rhymes that have such flair
Plus drawings of Linc and Brownie Bear
Since we’re Facebook friends, I know you care
So please do your part and click on “share”


Another birthday rhyme

For your big day I have a treat
It’s not a meal that you can eat
It’s not a check that you can cash
It’s not a place where you can crash
It’s not a board game you can play
It’s not a dye job for that gray
It just might give a spirit lift
This poem is your birthday gift


Excremential crisis

In just one month I’m 52
I have ennui and deja vu
I do not know what I should do
I could wear black or powder blue
I could eat steak or Irish stew
I could watch Jaws or something new
I could just pee or full on poo
Lord give a sign here in the loo!


730 Jean free days 💔

Two years ago I lost my wife
While others choose this day to weep
The end does not define her life
Her memory each day I keep


HB Mr. B

Today could be chucked in a bin
A grounded plane with damaged skin
Another plane but had to wait
I missed the bus ’cause we were late
Then had to stand out in the cold
All the delays had gotten old
And traffic as we got to Naas
We crawled along at a snail’s pace
Then at long last, I made it home
And quickly bought Glory to Rome
‘Cause Tony said to this weekend
And I obey my foul-mouthed friend


Happy birthday Roberta Marie Geraghty!!!

The day before my mom was twenty
She had two sons, and that was plenty
Tom was the first, and I was second
That should have been enough I reckon
But six years later came another
It was young James my baby brother
With help from dad, my dearest mommy
Took care of Jamie, Sean and Tommy
She is the best mom on the planet!
Disagree, and I’ll fight you dammit!


The gift that keeps giving

Another journey ‘round the sun
Another year of joy and fun
Another trip with plans to make
Another candle on your cake
Another chance to get your kicks
Another person drawn with sticks
Another post that’s so sublime
Another silly birthday rhyme


50 years 360 days

Soon year fifty will be no more
I’ll add a one to my age score
This crazy span is almost done
And then I will be fifty-one


Happy 50th SP! ❤

Happy birthday Sweetie Pea
Wish that you were here with me
In our house in Kilkenny
I’ll love you eternally



Hope your day is swell and happy
Better not be hell and crappy
If it’s more than you can handle
Burn an asshole with a candle


Everybody spread the word

Last weekend we did celebrate
Jean’s fond farewell to forty-eight
We drove up north to watch a play
And spent the night in Morro Bay
The drive was smooth, the weather fine
We ate good food and drank great wine
So many friends to hang out with
To honor her this June the Fifth
She’s so awesome, I have to say
We should make this a holiday


Happy birthday Tom!

I have a big brother named Tommy
We have the same daddy and mommy
We went to The Hat
To eat food and chat
Because they have the best pastrami


I hope your birthday is swell

It’s happy birthday time
My gift for you is rhyme
Your day will be sublime
It’s happy birthday time
I hope your birthday is swell
I hope you live long and well
I hope that you do not dwell
On jerks who should go to hell


Tip me over and I’m greater than infinity

On three squared / three squared
I’ll be seven squared years old
Yet I am still round


Happy birthday Sweetie Pea!

Jean is my love, I love my Jean
To me she’s kind, she’s never mean
She’s so funny and lot’s of fun
As sweetie peas, she’s number one
She’s got the looks, she’s got the smarts
She always cooks and never farts
I stay young with vitamin J
So let’s wish Jean – Happy Birthday!

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