Fills me with the urge to…

The Jizztrumpet fills me with hate
I get so mad I defecate
I loathe his hair and orange skin
Those lips above his triple chin
His tiny hands and belly size
Compel me to avert my eyes
Though not the last – another gripe
As leaders go he’s not my type


Life of Summer

Dead of Winter for our game night
Though midsummer and no frostbite
Zombies think we’re on the menu
Our survivors search each venue
Hospital and police station
Emptied decks at each location
Not one dude was undead dinner
Met my goal, so I was winner!


9171 7577 0794

First world problems from Niantic
Lack of knowledge had me frantic
World launch failed and then succeeded
So my fun was not impeded
We can play Wizards United
All the nerds will be delighted


Nor Sunday neither

The thing I did, did not get done
The game I played, did not get won
The deal I planned, did not get made
The job I worked, did not get paid
The clothes I washed, did not get clean
The gig I showed, did not get seen
Despite hard work for this soirée
No music will be heard today


I hope summer’s eternal

So far this summer
Has been a bummer
It would be more fun
If we had some sun
They say that next week
Through clouds it will peek
I don’t think it will
But I’m hoping still


I hope you win

I see you there
With your short hair
I hope you win your fight
You must be strong
For so, so long
You battle day and night
Your friends have shown
You’re not alone
They’re always there with you
I know you not
But now you’ve got
Another ally too



Twenty-four hit songs
Farewell to yellow brick road
The Rocketman soared


I ❤️ 2 💩

A log entry from me to you
I quite enjoy a number two
One’s not enough, and three won’t do
When squatting down up in the loo
A smelly fart might be a clue
Dropping a deuce is overdue
So I flush twice when I am through
Then wash my hands and bid adieu


Pray or prey?

The walking man walks
But where does he go?
The talking man talks
How much does he know?
The winning man wins
But what does he play?
The sinning man sins
For whom does he pray?


It’s possible in my head

I tried to drive the motorway
But clearly I should stay away
I did my best but still had fear
Of flying off this big blue sphere



When first we met on a crazy blind date
I did not know how lucky I would be
Our meeting was a lovely twist of fate
The perfect friend, you made me so happy
I love you as I never loved before
Since first we met for just a cup of tea
Each night I think about the vows we swore
I love you as I loved you
‘Cause you’re my sweet
‘Cause you’re my Sweetie Pea


Enter Sandman

I’m tired and I want to sleep
I throw my clothes onto the heap
I slide into my nice, soft bed
A pillow cradles my big head
At last an ending to this day
I shut my eyes and drift away

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