That’s awful! Awful funny!

This bears repeating
And it’s my breathing mantra
Rush Limbaugh is dead


What if?

Ever ponder fate though?
What if I didn’t go?
What if she didn’t show?
What if I had no dough?
What if she had a beau?
I guess we’ll never know


Órfhlaith is Orla

Órfhlaith from Tralee
Has stolen mo chroí (my heart)
If we meet at dawn
She’ll be my leannán (lover)
I would rather be
Just having some spraoi (fun)
But with my heart gone
My hair has turned bán (white)


I ❤️ 2 💩

A log entry from me to you
I quite enjoy a number two
One’s not enough, and three won’t do
When squatting down up in the loo
A smelly fart might be a clue
Dropping a deuce is overdue
So I flush twice when I am through
Then wash my hands and bid adieu


My CV is curiously vast

Today I had an interview
But not one job, it was for two
And when they tell me, “We want you!”
I’ll celebrate with Irish stew


Not that there’s anything wrong with that

There once was a father named Eamonn
Who got a big kick out of gay men
He liked how they’d play
With shirts off all day
Abú, hallelujah and amen!


And then I wake up

“Mmm hmm! Uh huh! Yeah, pull my hair!”
“Like that! Oh yeah! I’m almost there!”
“That feels so good! Don’t stop! Go! go!”
“Right there! Oh god! I’m gonna blow!”
Into the night, their bodies sweat
At last, she asks, “Are you done yet?!”


Better than the alternative

Will I always feel this way?
Will it stop and go away?
Will the memories and tears
Stay with me for many years?


181212 Ninth anniversary

When sweetie pea was by my side
We’d often laugh until we cried
It was with overwhelming pride
That she said yes to be my bride


No shit!


When you need to number two
You can push until you’re blue
But no matter what you do
Still does not produce a poo



Twinkle twinkle little Linc

I thought I got the tree for me
But little Linc thinks differently
A star should sit upon the peak
But that’s where Linc decides to sneak


My vision vault is never blank

I know I’m prone to being frank
If TMI, give me a spank
But there are times when this old Yank
Has visions saved up in my bank
Of past lovers I’d like to thank
Or boobies squeezed into a tank
And when my engine’s set to crank
I give myself a blissful wank



A man with a charity bucket
Once thought about trying to suck it
He knew that his dick
Would not do the trick
And wished he was born in Nantucket


Thanks FB Marketplace

I thought it would be really rough
But I just sold all of my stuff
Within this house, there’s just a bed
So I can rest my weary head


She thoughtfully takes a long while-y

There once was a lass named O’Reilly
Though missing her teeth, she was smiley
With no biting fangs
To gnaw on those wangs
The Sullivan lads praised her highly


And young lesbian love

I finished binge watching “Everything Sucks”
It was so 90’s, it had “Mighty Ducks”
My favorite part was watching Luke’s mom
Dating a white nerd she thought was the bomb


Heavyhearted haiku

Thinking about Jean
Makes me laugh and makes me cry
I’m ok with that


Or maybe the next day

Hard to be festive and merry
When the world is fucking scary
Though there’s pain and utter sorrow
I will be cheery tomorrow


Or GenCon or Origins or…

As a game geek, I’m not messin’
Really wish I was in Essen
Charterstone is on the hot list
Gaia Project cannot be missed
Scottish Clans are making whisky
Tony Boydell has some Nice Tea
Transatlantic, Keyper, Merlin
Now my mind cannot stop whirlin’
Altiplano, Codenames: Duet
All my gaming needs would be met
Though my love for games won’t lessen
Really wish I was in Essen


Asking for a friend

If you were special
To somebody who is gone
Are you still special?


Focus harder

I want to think about the good
But all I think about is bad
I want to think about the good
But all I think about is sad
I want to focus on good times
Instead of thinking of the end
I want to focus on good times
Instead of losing my best friend


She’s Aoife to my Strongbow

Through Waterford I went a hiking
I saw some crystal and a Viking
A moment was seized
Jean’s ashes released
This place would have been to her liking


The emojis of grief

Without Jean, the house is silent
Makes my thoughts turn dark and violent
Without Jean, my heart is hollow
Makes me want to mope and wallow
Without Jean, I feel erratic
Makes me seem overdramatic
Thanks to Jean, I will hang in there
And wake from this daily nightmare


Is a dream a lie if it don’t come true?

I dreamed of Jean again last night
Her beaming smile so big and bright
Her pretty face, her curly hair
Those eyes that loved without a care
It was as if she was still here
Then I awoke and shed a tear
This happens every single day
I hope it never goes away


Jean is my Wonder Woman

Though sweet Jean is still real sick
Those good thoughts sure did the trick
You can always send some more
To this cancer warrior


We will take what you can give

We need your good thoughts
We need your love and friendship
Now more than ever


She’s a dancing machine

I really love my sweetie Jean
From one to ten, she’s a fifteen
She’s super smart, her wit is keen
She makes the hard work seem routine
She’s a great cook, such fine cuisine
She perks me up more than caffeine
She’s always nice and never mean
I’m not a king, but she’s my queen


Share that shit!

Are you providing new content
Or hoping memes show your dissent?
If all you do is click on share
I question if you really care
Don’t simply share, please add your thoughts
Help simpletons connect the dots
And one last thing I beg of you
If you do share, share my shit too!


It’s time for him to go

The Jizztrumpet had a secret
And he thought he’d always keep it
To Russia he was beholden
‘Cause of showers that were golden
He will deny this tinkle tryst
While he’s on twitter getting pissed!


Keep sending good thoughts

Old doc’s treatment had been subpar
So I took Jean to the ER
New doc came in with an answer
Now we know it’s fucking cancer
Been in pain, and three months later
Clearly old doc was a traitor
Bad news isn’t ever easy
And I know that this sounds cheesy
Sweetie Pea is a big brawler
She will make the tumors smaller
Your support has been tremendous
Thanks for all the love you send us


So happy for wars in the stars

Nerds and fanboys are in heaven
No more wait for Star Wars VII
Jocks, jerks, Jedis, and Jamaicans
Get to see The Force Awakens
Never thought we’d see these sequels
Hope they’re better than the prequels
Not sure which show I can go to
Post a spoiler, I’ll unfriend you!