Zip zop wop boopity bop

The DA did agree
And that’s the argument
Bill Cosby might be free
But he’s not innocent


Late night – late light

Not to worry yet
The days are getting shorter
But it’s light at 10


He crushed his enemies

There once was a quipster named Conan
Who certainly lacked melatonin
But night after night
With all of his might
He helped to produce serotonin


Nap lap trap

Linc nestles into my lap
Just so he can take a nap
As the hours fly on by
I might be stuck here till July


Happy yoga day

I want to go to Rome in Italia
But you have to dress the part
And I don’t look good wearing a toga
T-O-G-A, toga
I have to lose some weight, so I sat on a rug
I reached for my toes
‘Cause I’m gonna try to do some Yoga
Y-O-G-A, yoga
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga
Well, I’m not the world’s most flexible guy
But when I bent my back I nearly broke my spine
Fuckin’ yoga!
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga
Well, I’m not dumb, but I can’t understand
How people touch their toes
Just by reaching their hand
Fuckin’ yoga!
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga
Well, I bent, posed, stretched and strained all night
But still my hamstring’s just too tight
I stood straight up, and then went on my knees
And demonstrated how an old dog pees
Well, I’m not the world’s most dexterous man
But I know what I am and I’m just a fat man
Who can’t do Yoga
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoga


A yankee is a quickie when you’re alone

This dork who would cheer for the Yankees
Would fill all his pockets with hankies
When there was no doubt
He’d whip a cloth out
And celebrate with a few wankees


It’s a win-wank

I want to travel since I can
But lack of money stops that plan
I have few skills for making bank
But I’m a pro at wink and wank
This talent solves my money plans
I’m gonna start an OnlyFans


Covid tunnel syndrome

After months of isolation
My fertile imagination
And futile infatuation
Leads to frequent masturbation


You put your right one in…

I’m watching a show about Loki
Some think he’s as tasty as gnocchi
They would take it out
And shake it about
In order to do Loki pokey


Second jab is Saturday

Listing my imagination
After second vaccination
I can take a plane to Cali
Or go hike the Great Rift Valley
I can visit my relations
Hug and touch to feel sensations
See the Dead in Sarasota
Or twine ball in Minnesota
I can go to Spain and Quito
Searching for the best burrito
I can play games at conventions
Smoke weed and explore dimensions
I can have a pint of cider
I can put my tip inside her
I might burst just like a geyser
After second jab of Pfizer


Walk Brownie walk

Walked with Brownie really far
Walked downtown past Ryan’s Bar
We walked past outdoor cafes
People basking in sunrays
We saw shops with fish and meat
Brownie thought he’d earned a treat
We walked past the new skate park
And small dogs that always bark
We walked past a donut shop
Brownie wouldn’t let me stop
We saw people all around
Life returning to this town
We crossed bridges here and there
I walked far with Brownie Bear


Happy 53 Sweetie Pea

If Sweetie Pea
Was here with me
She too would be 53
I shed a tear
‘Cause she’s not here
49 again this year


Happy Pride 2021!!!!!!!!!

I love the gays, I love the bis
I love the queers of every size
I love all types of lesbians
Especially my gamer friends
I love the trans and aces too
I love the pans and they love you
I did not always think this way
I thought it weird if you were gay
I used to yell such horrid names
And then I learned my brother James
Was gay and so were all his friends
I’ve done my best to make amends
I love all love in all its forms
And if this is against your norms
Then I won’t wait to disavow
I’m proud to be an ally now

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