Are we not doing phrasing anymore?

There once was an agent named Lana
A hottie – as hot as a sauna
Though he held out hope
She told Archer “Nope!”
Her danger zone was his nirvana


They enjoyed Kilkenny

Vacation for my mom and dad
A splendid trip I hope they had
We ate and drank and had the craic
They went to Mayo and came back
We toured Kilkenny without rain
But now they’re leaving on a plane
Until I see them in twelve weeks
Ignore the tear stains on my cheeks


It’s about to get Irish as fuck

Leaves are turning brown
It’s autumn in Kilkenny
I’m a bit frightened


No “o” mon

There once was a gal from Jamaica
Who would dance and knew how to shake-a
When in the right mood
She’d bed a fine dude
But end up by needing to fake-a


Toad is a dick!

Raphael has a pointy sai
Captain Mal has a Firefly
GI Joe has a kung fu grip
Jizztrumpet has a mushroom tip
Ms Pac-Man has a cute hair bow
These are things that I can’t unknow


I quite wish they would quit and be quiet

I don’t like the shouting
It causes self-doubting
The fighting and screaming
Is far from redeeming
Step back from the violence
And enjoy the silence


Come fly her friendly skies

There once was a lass at the airport
The pages were full in her passport
She earned every stamp
The mile high club tramp
An entrepreneurial escort


We have all done this

Clean clean clean clean clean
My parents will be here soon
Clean clean clean clean clean


Happy birthday Roberta Marie Geraghty!!!

The day before my mom was twenty
She had two sons, and that was plenty
Tom was the first, and I was second
That should have been enough I reckon
But six years later came another
It was young James my baby brother
With help from dad, my dearest mommy
Took care of Jamie, Sean and Tommy
She is the best mom on the planet!
Disagree, and I’ll fight you dammit!


She was pretty and pretty crazy

There once was a woman named Daisy
She laid in bed, but wasn’t lazy
A fave of the lads
Their uncles and dads
She left them all happy and hazy


The gift that keeps giving

Another journey ‘round the sun
Another year of joy and fun
Another trip with plans to make
Another candle on your cake
Another chance to get your kicks
Another person drawn with sticks
Another post that’s so sublime
Another silly birthday rhyme


50 years 360 days

Soon year fifty will be no more
I’ll add a one to my age score
This crazy span is almost done
And then I will be fifty-one

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