He shan’t do that again

Woke last night to quite a scare
Something riled up Brownie bear
Went downstairs to scrutinize
And could not believe my eyes
Little Linc was moaning low
He had stuck his pinky toe
In the radiator grill
Underneath the window sill
He was hanging upside down
Front paws couldn’t touch the ground
Don’t know how long he was there
Flailing, mewling in the air
Picked him up and set him free
Linc collapsed upon my knee
We had gotten such a fright
That we slept all day and night


Forever and ever

When you lose someone to cancer
Paying tribute is the answer
Memories you cannot sever
Because they loved you forever


We should always be more knightly

Do not take your chances lightly
When somebody fills you brightly
Grab them quick, and squeeze them tightly
You might get to see them nightly


The ALL CAPS asshole

If you threaten him
He will ALL CAPS threaten you
He has the best threats


Honor offer on her off her

There once was a lad named O’Connor
Who offered young Deirdre his honor
Accepting his gift
She laid down right swift
She wanted O’Connor right on her


Lazy days of Summer

Though it’s barely one
Linc lays in the sun
Brownie’s in my lap
Guess we need a nap


It’s chaos, be kind

It’s getting close to one year gone
I’ve moved away but not moved on
To all the friends I left behind
You all should know, you’re on my mind
I’ve made mistakes both here and there
But with Linc’s help and Brownie Bear
I’ll make it through each day and night
To one year since we lost Jean Wright


England has suffered enough this week

Baby Trumpet in the sky
Jizzing lies that make me cry
Didn’t know that shit could fly
Now I want to get so high


I want gulaš for all

France and Croatia
Roosters versus tablecloths
The World Cup Final


I’d rather she looked like Curly

There once was a woman from Kerry
Who rarely shaved so she was hairy
Of course down below
She grew quite a ‘fro
And looked like the Stooge known as Larry


Water restrictions in Ireland?!?

It’s been so long without the rain
Sure it’s as hot as France or Spain
The whitest Irish has a tan
We’re now under a hosepipe ban
With dirty cars and dying plants
We need to do a Riverdance
Dry kiddie pools – ain’t that a bitch
While water sprays the hurling pitch!


This is America

Jizzy Trumpet builds a wall
He is a racist phony
Bob Mueller investigates
Let’s hear the testimony
Jizzy Trumpet, is a freak
Daughter makes him randy
Grabbing pussies all the time
His teensy-weensy handy


I had to buy a fan!

Another day of scorching sun
This heat wave never will be done
Despite my sweat I won’t complain
‘Cause soon enough it will piss rain

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