180509
Having pets is not cheap
I drove real far so we can fly
I had to see my money guy
No matter how much dough is lost
Brownie and Linc are worth the cost
Tag: Ireland
Poems and/or Drawings about St. Patrick’s Day, Ireland and/or all things Irish.
180504
180504
I’m back on the 15th
I did not sleep, woke at first light
Forgot my passport for the flight
I have more stress than one man should
I can’t wait till I’m here for good!
180423
180423
Am I?
I walk down the lane
Through the fine soft rain
The banks are a pain
No sleep hurts my brain
But I’m keeping sane
180420
180420
I’m a cat dammit!
It’s totally worth all the hassle
To get the keys to me own castle!
It’s totally worth every penny
I now own a house in Kilkenny!
180418
180418
They’re at Hotel MomNDad
My two pets got left behind
Brownie didn’t seem to mind
As he shredded up the drape
Linc made plans for his escape
Leaving them doth make me swoon
I’ll be back to get them soon
180409
180409
Well done lad!
There once was a hurler named TJ
Whose Kilkenny Cats had a field day
The fans all adored
How often he scored
They queued up to give him a BJ
180406
180406
Tickets purchased!
After months of preparation
Packing, waiting, perspiration
Closing date has been decided
Now’s the time to get excited!
180314
180314
I chose warmly
Found a gift card in my pocket
Added shopping to my docket
Wanted to buy some more LEGOs
But instead I got some warm clothes
180312
180312
New fight song?
We all hail from Mayo
And we wear the green and red
We’re on fire
For Sam Maguire
We’ll root until we’re dead
From the boggy plains of Mayo
To the blue Atlantic shore
In every house with thatch
When there’s a football match
The whole county starts to roar!
M! (3 claps)
A! (3 claps)
Y! (3 claps)
O! (3 claps)
M-A-Y-O! #UpMayo
180117
180117
Just the tip
There was a strange man from Kilkenny
Who’d suck his own dick for a penny
The kind of a guy
Who’d blast in his eye
If given a ten or a twenny
180115
180115
This little piggy went to Waterford
There was a fat man from Dungarvan
Who sharpened his knives to start carvin’
He slaughtered a beast
And cooked a huge feast
Then ate it all like he was starvin’
171011
171011
His BAC was doublin’
There once was a young man from Dublin
Who drank all the drinks that were bubblin’
When his blood was checked
His doctor was wrecked
That this man was breathing was troublin’
171007
171007
He had the gift of gab
There once was a priest from Killarney
Who everyone called Father Barney
He would ask a lass
To kneel down like mass
And kiss his stones like they were Blarney
171004
171004
Me-wow!
There once was a lad from Cork city
Who bought drinks for girls that were pretty
If they owned a cat
He’d go to their flat
And asked if he could pet their kitty
170930
170930
Uncanny granny
There once was a boy from Mulranny
Who always stayed home with his granny
He tripped on her skirt
Though he wasn’t hurt
He went blind when he saw her fanny
170927
170927
She’s Aoife to my Strongbow
Through Waterford I went a hiking
I saw some crystal and a Viking
A moment was seized
Jean’s ashes released
This place would have been to her liking
170317
170317
Throat punch for Patty
Every Irish lass and laddie
Knows today is all for Paddy
From Clonmel to Cincinnati
They’ll punch you if you say Patty
170315
170315
I’m a leprechaun artist
St. Paddy’s day – you can’t escape
Just two more days to get in shape
You’ll eat and drink till you’re a sphere
But please don’t drink green, fucking beer
160624
160624
#Brexit? how ’bout #FuxItUp!
EU is a bloody mess
Like a Donald Trump U.S.
Merry England wants to leave
Chaos is all they achieve
Scotland voted to remain
And Gibraltar next to Spain
Ulster said it wants to stay
Now they may unite some day
UK’s money loses ground
Peso’s worth more than the pound
Misinformed and racist Brits
Put their county in the shits
Now the home of Mr. Bean
Can’t be saved by king or queen
160401
160401
International Trump day
Brownie and Raven are good dogs
On weekends, we go riding hogs
I want to move to the UK
I want to work all night and day
Trojans and Yankees are my faves
Olives and mushrooms are my craves
Corned Beef is the best Irish food
That Kanye West is one cool dude
I like DC more than Marvel
I like life forms that were larval
The best rock group is Fleetwood Mac
My life is planned by zodiac
Tom Cruise told me about Xenu
It fits right in with my world view
As president, Trump has the tools
If you believe this – April Fools!
160316
160316
Green beer is for sasanaigh
Put on your green, and raise your beer
At last, St. Patrick’s Day is here!
I’ll speak about the Emerald Isle
And you might end up with a smile
Pull up a chair, and sit right down
We love the craic and hate the crown
We like our food boiled in a pot
Cabbage is good, corned beef is not
Only three leaves on a shamrock
The trunk’s a boot; a lake’s a lough
Jumpers are worn when it’s fierce cold
It’s always fierce the truth be told
The coffee might contain Baileys
To warm you up before céilís
Of course you know, we love our beer
But if it’s green, get out of here!
160222
160222
Planning exit strategy
I just got back, unpacked my bag
Got me a case of the jet lag
I haven’t been home for one day
Already know I will not stay
I miss the craic, I miss the fun
I miss the food and everyone
I want to go to pubs at night
So I make plans for the next flight
160219
160219
The city animal is a pussy
There was a farmer from Kilkenny
The women he bedded were many
When there came a need
To scatter his seed
He realized he didn’t have any
160217
160217
All aboard!
We passed through Limerick on vacation
And saw a man at the train station
His pants on the ground
A crowd gathered ’round
And witnessed his wild masturbation
160215
160215
I’d cross the Shannon for Shannon
There once was a lass from ol’ Limerick
She was ginger so sure she’s a mick
I had in my head
To take her to bed
But I knew that I would finish quick
160212
160212
Westport we’re in you
In Westport on this winter day
We walked the Wild Atlantic Way
The bitter cold chilled to the bone
This frigid climate is well known
Despite the weather we did roam
Because some day this might be home
160210
160210
The weather is exactly as planned
We will fly up in the air
We will go from here to there
We will go from nice and warm
To a place that loves to storm
Here it’s 80 Fahrenheit
Then a Trans-Atlantic flight
What is waiting there for us?
Rain and zero Celsius
151102
151102
Happy birthday dad!!!
There once was a Paddy from Mayo
Who moved to the US of A oh
He married a wife
And later in life
Three boys made his hair go all gray-o
150821
150821
12-16 weeks, then see ya!
Gonna get me a passport
Gonna make me a citizen
Gonna sell the old escort
Gonna stop watching CNN
I’m gonna get me a passport
Moving to my father’s land
I’m gonna start watching the sport
Where they do not use their hand
140317
140317
Paddy O’Downer
It happens every year
Wannabes drink green beer
Eat cabbage and corned beefs
Think shamrocks have four leafs
I don’t want to be mean
But simply wearing green
And acting childish
Doesn’t make you Irish
0624
0624
Galway not Limerick
There once was a lady from Galway
Who met a young sailor from Norway
He asked for a dance
Unbuckled his pants
She saw it and said no fucking way