190401
Yes we are
There is no wall and
UK is still in EU
Must be April Fools
The Jizztrumpet is a racist, sexist, misogynistic, homophobic, xenophobic, islamaphobic, tiny fingered, Cheeto-faced, ferret wearing shitgibbon who wants you to pay his taxes for him so he can build a wall that Mexico will not pay for and gain access to the nuclear codes while he’s grabbing a pussy with one hand and jerking off Putin with the other.
190204
There’s always next year
Sportsball isn’t fun
The Patriots won
New England is glad
The rest of us sad
Old England won too
The green boys are blue
The cats got a loss
Jizztrumpet’s still boss
This world is all wrong
Let’s toke on this bong
181126
Disorder at the border
Once more Jizztrumpet is an ass
He authorized the use of gas
Good people shout and scream and cuss
That gas brings tears to all of us
Like Hitler this will not end well
Jizztrumpet you can go to hell!
181119
A rake of shit
The Jizztrumpet rakes up the leaves
His fucking face gives me dry heaves
With Putin, Foster, Pence and May
I wish they all would blow away
181107
More like a blue ripple
Here is my note to voting Yanks
You passed the test, so here’s my thanks
The Senate makes me want to cuss
So all you get is a C+
181003
Every word is insincere
Lifetime judge his dream career
And he really likes his beer
He’s unhinged that is quite clear
She has lived a life of fear
Jizztrumpet will taunt and jeer
Rabid fans did clap and cheer
When will this all disappear?
Hope he chokes on his next beer
180919
Toad is a dick!
Raphael has a pointy sai
Captain Mal has a Firefly
GI Joe has a kung fu grip
Jizztrumpet has a mushroom tip
Ms Pac-Man has a cute hair bow
These are things that I can’t unknow
180822
But you should share this
Go see the pope in Phoenix Park
Stroll through an alley after dark
Jump in a pile of broken glass
Ignore effects of greenhouse gas
Elect outsiders out of spite
In thunderstorms go fly a kite
Don’t bother wiping after poo
These are some things you should not do
180723
The ALL CAPS asshole
If you threaten him
He will ALL CAPS threaten you
He has the best threats
180713
England has suffered enough this week
Baby Trumpet in the sky
Jizzing lies that make me cry
Didn’t know that shit could fly
Now I want to get so high
180704
This is America
Jizzy Trumpet builds a wall
He is a racist phony
Bob Mueller investigates
Let’s hear the testimony
Jizzy Trumpet, is a freak
Daughter makes him randy
Grabbing pussies all the time
His teensy-weensy handy
180622
More than they possibly can
Mizztrumpet jacket
“I really don’t care do u?
Yes, I fucking do!
180413
Where is our “Thank you America?”
Friday the thirteenth
Unlucky for Syria
Perhaps the whole world
180305
Subpoena Sam
There is a Sam under subpoena
Who’s crazier than a hyena
He’s either a drunk
Or Roger Stone’s punk
He needs to flee to Argentina
180226
Last time he ran was for President
Into the school he would have run
He said he wouldn’t need a gun
Both cops and students he’s maligned
Jizztrumpet’s lost his fucking mind
180207
I hope it rains!
He wants a wall and ICE to raid
Jizztrumpet craves a yuge parade
He needs to hear a fusillade
While his supporters drink Kool-Aid
180205
Now we’re all poor – LOL
Listen to the bankers bawling
Rich people are caterwauling
All because the Dow Jones falling
My broke ass just sits here lolling
180103
Things a Jizztrumpet would tweet
“My grabbing of pussies is great”
“I’m best when I’m tweeting out hate”
“My button is bigger than yours”
“I’m gonna cause nuclear wars”
171230
Worst year ever!
Twenty seventeen –
The worst of my fifty years –
Sucked a fat dog’s ass
171227
So over 2017
Can’t wait for this year to end
So hard losing my best friend
Jizztrumpet is a big child
Neo-Nazis running wild
Orders for a Muslim ban
Stimulates the Ku Klux Klan
All women hashtag #MeToo
Roy Moore’s lawyer is a Jew
Rich folks got a big tax break
Bigots won’t bake wedding cake
Star Wars fans hate number VIII
Next year best be fucking great
171129
We are America’s HR Dept!!!
In big business you get fired
In Hollywood you get fired
In media you get fired
In publishing you get fired
At CBS you get fired
At House of Cards you get fired
At MPR you get fired
At NBC you get fired
No matter what has transpired
In Politics you get hired
171125
It’s not on his side
He’s always on the nightly news
His every tweet gives us the blues
One place Jizztrumpet won’t be seen
The cover of Time Magazine
171104
We are family
White House is a huge disgrace
Jizztrumpet is in our face
Hollywood is showing warts
Nothing good in world of sports
Ragnarok is doing well
Breast cancer can go to hell
But I do not give a damn
I’m just hanging with the fam
170909
HB2U
Hope your day is swell and happy
Better not be hell and crappy
If it’s more than you can handle
Burn an asshole with a candle
170721
I don’t <3 Huckabee Sanders
No more bushes to hide in
Or Jizztrumpet bullshit spin
No more #AltFacts off the hip
Spicer’s jumping off the ship
170712
He has no valves to press
Jizztrumpet junior is not smart
His treachery is off the chart
It’s funny that it’s his email
That shows the USA for sale
170703
Happy fucking Fourth of July
On this sad 4th of July
The Jizztrumpet makes me cry
He shows allies no respect
World wide image is now wrecked
Presidential he is not
Melting down our melting pot
Every tweet’s a dis or brag
It’s like shitting on the flag
Though we beg, urge and beseech
GOP will not impeach
While you eat your barbecue
The POTUS is fucking you
170609
#Predisent #Covfefe
This White House isn’t eloquent
With #Covfefe and #Predisent
Established rules they circumvent
To crush this Great Experiment
170531
Sleep tight don’t let the covfefes bite
“Despite the constant
Negative press covfefe
I wrote a haiku”
170526
Sad!
Jizztrumpet says Germans are bad
One of the worst was his own dad
This has to make most teutons mad
But does make him Putin’s comrade