Poems and/or Drawings about Movies.
140821
Road to everywhere
Before we went on vacation
I felt tied to the whipping post
Mostly due to my vocation
Then we drove up and down the coast
This trip has been a lot of fun
Despite driving for ten long days
Our personal Cannonball Run
We’ve seen so much I’m in a daze
140803
Bobcats, turkeys and deer, oh my!
Playing games and watching bands
Hiking over arid lands
Stalking bobcats through the trees
Enjoying a gentle breeze
Watching movies with my gal
Helps to improve my morale
Though we try to make them last
Weekends go by much too fast
140717
Holy stupid limerick
There once was a hero named Batman
His enemy Penguin’s a fat man
The rotund bad guy
Tried stealing a pie
But the Dark Knight prevented that plan
140709
Holy Geritol Batman
Here’s something that ain’t no jive
Batman is seventy-five
Gordon’s been flashing the sign
Going back to ’39
The World’s Greatest Detective
Has been pretty effective
Diminishing Gotham’s crime
Even though from time to time
A two-bit hood like Two-Face
Makes Bats look like a disgrace
Then Robin will stop the gang
By throwing his batarang
Batman’s Bruce and Robin’ Dick
Make this duo dynamic
140625
He needs to Kim Jong Chill
Because of Franco and Rogen
The world might go to war again
“The Interview” is coming soon
In which they murder Kim Jong Un
He’s accusing them of terror
I think his critique’s in error
I guess his humor has no sense
Because he’s threatened our defense
If he’s no fan of comedy
I wonder what he’d do to me
140525
Like sex for me in 80’s
There was a man named Professor X
His students could move and blast objects
Slide around on ice
Use claws that could slice
Watching X-Men is as good as sex
140225
Who you gonna call?
There was a Ghostbuster named Egon
Who knew how to contain a hell spawn
With particle beams
You don’t cross the streams
But he did, and now he has passed on
140127
If I had one to sell
I would commit the perfect crime
In order to get more free time
There’s not enough time in the day
I have to work instead of play
When I was young, I had the time
But then I didn’t have a dime
Free time and money are the goal
To have them both, I’d sell my soul!
1204
Gadot is no Carter
“Wonder Woman is too skinny
Though she looks good in a mini”
Fanboys are antagonistic
They are never realistic
They’re as fun as a root canal
But they hope Zack picked the right Gal
1023
Stay classy Ben & Jerry
My ice cream belt gets one more notch
Ron Burgundy’s Scotchy, Scotch, Scotch
This ice cream has butterscotch swirls
And it’s enjoyed by boys and girls
If you’re like Ron from the tele
Eat it down into your belly
Two thumbs up from Brian and Champ
To quote Brick Tamland, “I love lamp”
1008
You never know what you’re gonna get
Though he exercised and ate Wheaties
Tom Hanks has Type 2 Diabetes
Why he got it needs further study
But sugar ain’t his Bosom Buddy
0923
Being green costs a lot of green
Tesla was once known for a coil
Now it’s a car that needs no oil
I saw one in Los Alamos
For that town, it was grandiose
No place for an electric car
Owned by an aging movie star
Getting drunk in a wine-fueled haze
Kind of like that movie Sideways
Is the car about being green
Or do you get it to be seen?
Electric cars are close at hand
But this one is a hundred grand!
0829
Damn you Marvel Studios!
Speculation is now gone
James Spader will play Ultron
In comics he’s built by Pym
But the movie won’t have him
So there goes my costume plan
I cannot go as Ant-Man
0824
Supes is fab!
There once was a baby from Krypton
Who grew up and was know for his brawn
He and Lex Luthor
Were always at war
Over who looked the best in chiffon
0823
Jersey Girl wasn’t that bad
Never known for having priorities straight
Comic book geeks are unreasonably irate
Keeping in mind we dropped the bomb on Japan
The worst thing ever is Affleck as Batman
It’s hard to argue when the heads aren’t level
“He sucked in Gigli. He sucked as Daredevil”
Is it really his fault that those movies failed?
“Yes! Get a cross and make sure his hands are nailed!”
He’s no Brando, but I liked him in “Mallrats”
So, throw down the pitchforks and let go the bats
Your quarrel is as moot as this is bizarre
Peter Dinklage Hula Hooped at a gay bar
0719
Horror flick haiku
The theatre is full
Fingers clench; knuckles whiten
somewhere a girl screams
0530
Grumpy Cat is so intense
Here’s some news that will make you squeal
Grumpy cat has a movie deal
Will it be a flop or a hit?
Honey Badger don’t give a shit
0508
All hail Bones!
Last night we played Star Trek Catan
We went where no starship had gone
It was fun, and I did enjoy
My win thanks to Dr. McCoy
0504
Utinni!
From Luke to Yoda to R2D2
To Han Solo – “May the 4th be with you!”
From A New Hope to Empire to Jedi
We know that Darth Vader is the bad guy
The prequels sucked from here to the Death Star
Anakin is a brat and fuck Jar Jar
Will VII through IX redeem the franchise?
They only sure thing is more merchandise
0404
R.I.P. @ebertchicago
Sadly, Roger Ebert has passed
His knowledge of movies was vast
He and Siskel gave us two thumbs
Up for the champs, down for the bums
His favorites included Fargo
Citizen Kane, Ran and Argo
He disapproved of top ten lists
Opinions like his will be missed
He lived life; he didn’t hold back
At the Movies now fades to black
0305
Artemia NYOS rule
Is it worse to meet twilight junkies
Or somebody into Sea-Monkeys?
Sparkling vampires cause Stoker to Spin
But instant life pets are full of win
0301
Spock shot first
I’m such a big nerd that my heart swelled
When Obama said Jedi Mind Meld
I don’t care that Trek and Wars were mixed
I just want the economy fixed
0226
Pyramid Pyromania
Old Pope is stepping down
Helen Hunt wears cheap gown
Ben’s Argo is the best
Blizzards hit the midwest
In Egypt, balloons crash
Gasoline costs more cash
Blade Runner kills girl friend
Gun deaths won’t ever end
0206
Disney + Star Wars = So Many ???
When it comes to cool, there is no equal
Han solo is tops, but why a prequel?
Disney should think twice about who they cast
Channing or Taylor would leave me aghast
Perhaps Michael Cera could play young Han
Selling bananas out of a Tauntaun
Donald Glover as Lando would make sense
Just thinking about this is so intense
Mostly I wonder how they’ll screw it up
The Star Wars version of 2 Girls 1 Cup
To those involved, if you don’t get it right
You should all be frozen in carbonite
0205
Use the cash Luca$
Disney is doing what Lucas wouldn’t
But some fanboys think the mouse house shouldn’t
They picked a guy that penned a Toy Story
Will he bring the franchise back to glory?
Does Star Trek helmer know about the force?
Luke should never say, “Sulu, plot a course!”
Lastly, the prequels were so full of suck
They will need a kiss from Leia “for luck”
