Tag: Weapons

180221

180221
Wakanda forever

Wakanda is cool
Bald women with spears are hot
Black Panther is great

180115

180115
This little piggy went to Waterford

There was a fat man from Dungarvan
Who sharpened his knives to start carvin’
He slaughtered a beast
And cooked a huge feast
Then ate it all like he was starvin’

180108

180108
2018 – the year of the block

Blocking isn’t taken lightly
I don’t scroll and do it nightly
Post your nonsense, cause a clamor
You’ll get hit with my banhammer

170410

170410
This looks Hela good!

Hammer shock
Ragnarok
I predict lines ’round the block
Hulk and Thor
Go to war
This is what I’ve waited for!

170407

170407
War, huh, yeah

Those children need help not war
But Jizztrumpet slammed the door
Missiles flying through the air
Where they land he does not care
White men watch in the West Wing
Putin pulls his puppet’s string

170310

170310
Just like war priests at black masses

There once was a half-orc named Oloch
Who got his sword stuck in the bedrock
It wasn’t that dumb
He channeled Gorum
Which helped him defeat a dark warlock

160919

160919
Prepare to be boarded!

If ye want to plunder booty
Of a Jolly Roger cutie
Ask her with a salty swagger
If she’ll scabbard yer big dagger

Dungeons and Dragons is a game
No two adventures are the same
If demogorgon is your foe
The Dungeon Master’s not your bro
You try to cast a fireball
But rolling seven’s your downfall
When armed with rocks and wrist-bound slings
You may encounter Stranger Things

160819

160819
This goblin Poap he ain’t no dope

Poap is goblin warrior
Stabbing foes is not a bore
When he cuts, your blood will pour
Then he’ll do it more, more, more!
————————————
Poap is hungry ’cause he’s fat
So he ate your smelly cat
If you’re not okay with that
He will chop your head off – splat!

150710

150710
SD I want to be in you

Comic-Con – I want to go
Comic-Con – it’s such a show
Pop culture and comic geeks
Haven’t changed their clothes in weeks
Cosplayers dressed to the nines
Hours spent waiting in lines
Rumors aren’t in short supply
Find out first who’s next to die
Hard to find a place to crash
Hope you brought a ton of cash
Comic-Con – it isn’t fair
Comic-Con – I can’t be there

1215

1215
The Smaug affair and back again

The Road Goes Ever On
By J.R.R. Tolkien

Roads go ever ever on,
Over rock and under tree,
By caves where never sun has shone,
By streams that never find the sea;
Over snow by winter sown,
And through the merry flowers of June,
Over grass and over stone,
And under mountains of the moon.

Roads go ever ever on
Under cloud and under star,
Yet feet that wandering have gone
Turn at last to home afar.
Eyes that fire and sword have seen
And horror in the halls of stone
Look at last on meadows green
And trees and hills they long have known.

0528

0528
Unlike is not fun like

I want someone’s head on a spike
‘Cause we’ve received our first “unlike”
Though I’m relieved that you’re still here
What made that person disappear?

0325

0325
I <3 Merle the pearl

On the last Walking Dead
Asshole Governor said
We will leave you alone
If you bring me Michonne
Rick considers the plan
What is wrong with that man?
Merle attempts to amend
Daryl cries at the end

0309

0309
GoT is coming

If you are a Lannister
You really know your sister
If you’re like Theon Greyjoy
Friendship is merely a ploy
If you’re more like Arya Stark
Your bite is worse than your bark
If you guard on the Night’s Watch
You vow not to use your crotch
If you lose the Game of Thrones
You’ll end up as rotting bones

0301

0301
Spock shot first

I’m such a big nerd that my heart swelled
When Obama said Jedi Mind Meld
I don’t care that Trek and Wars were mixed
I just want the economy fixed

0113

0113
Snicker snacks are my favorite y’all!

Jabberwocky
By Lewis Carroll

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!”
He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought —
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
“And, has thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!’
He chortled in his joy.

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.