Marathon Monday

If Mondays make you wince or cringe
You just might need a streaming binge
Try Disney+, Netflix or Prime
Watch drama, comedy or crime
There is a new Lord of the Rings
And Season 4 of Stranger Things
My bedtime was three hours ago
But new dragons on HBO!


Spoilers in 5-7-5

Winterfell fallen
Murder Girl killed Zombie King
Undead now deader


That’s all you got for GoT

Want to talk of Winterfell
Want to cry and want to yell
But I do not want to spoil
That might get your blood to boil
Four more days is all you got
Friday I reveal the plot


Night gathers and now my watch begins

Long winter time is here again
This one will stay till who knows when
Like Game of Thrones this one will last
Until at least four years have passed


Here we stand

There once was a girl named Lyanna
A fierce protector like Diana
A girl among men
She’s proven again
To the Starks, she is top banana


‪#‎Hodor‬ ‪#‎HoldTheDoor‬

He did his job
He held the door
He made us sob
Goodbye Hodor


8 lines about 4 #GoT women

Arya said she had no name
But at night she says her list
Brienne was a bit too tall
Fights men off but never kissed
Cersei was her brother’s twin
And she has him by the balls
Dany was a dragon girl
She’s unburnt but not the Khals


Tormund says he is small below

There was a know nothing named Snow
Whose girlfriend shot him with a bow
His brothers did stab
Left him on a slab
At picking friends he’s just so-so


Why is GoT so rapey?

I’ll still watch you Game of Thrones
Though you chill me to my bones
Biggest question with this show
Why do you hate women so?
Sand snakes aren’t as good as guys
They should fight someone their size
Arya beaten with a rod
Queen is jailed by the god squad
She can’t even help her bro
‘Cause they say he’s a big ‘mo
Poor Sansa should have escaped
Not all women should be raped


He do not sow

We said goodbye to Ziggy
He wasn’t very biggie
A tiny little fishy
Who wasn’t very swishy
Though it’s a little meta
We got another betta
His blue is almost neon
I think we’ll call him Theon


Apologies to Night Ranger

Sister Cersei – oh, Jaime has come
Then he pushes Bran, and that is dumb
Foul play, no way
Then King Robert tries to fight a boar
But he loses, and that starts a war
Bran flew, ’cause you

They’re Hodoring
Three-eyed crow in flight
As Summer he will bite
The walkers are all white

Bran, you know Hodor is walking fast
Going north you find the wall at last
Robb slay by Frey
Sister Cersei – Joffrey’s much too mean
You don’t care because you’re still the queen
You preen, obscene, yeah

Bran’s on your back upright
Jojen’s got the greensight
And Hodor is your might
Three-eyed crow in flight
As Summer he will bite
The walkers are all white

Sister Cersei – now Joffrey is dead
That drives Margaery to Tommen’s bed
Kismet, you bet

But they’re Hodoring
Yeah, Hodoring!



Hodor Hodor Hodor Hodor H
Odor Hodor Hodor Hodor Ho
Dor Hodor Hodor Hodor Hod
Or Hodor Hodor Hodor Hodo
R Hodor Hodor Hodor Hodor


Don’t mock the imp at your own wedding

There once was a boy in King’s Landing
Whose wife was better at glad handing
On their wedding day
There was some foul play
Which most viewers thought was outstanding


Spring can’t come soon enough

Drink your wine and drown in your beer
Game of Thrones is done for the year
Hard to top what happened last week
But Ramsay tries by taunting “Reek”
Tywin and son have a good talk
Balon Greyjoy gets a used cock
Yara sails for the Narrow Sea
Jaime reunites with Cersei
Lord Varys does not impress Shae
Davos helps Gendry get away
Stannis may fight beyond the wall
Dragon Girl is mother to all
Most think that Sansa is last Stark
Arya’s bite is worse than Hound’s bark
Ygritte with her bow and arrow
Points out “You know nothing Jon Snow”
Sam and Gilly find secret door
Hodor Hodor Hodor Hodor


Flay the Freys!

There once was a man named Walder Frey
Who massacred on a wedding day
He’s a wretched crank
Who needs a good shank
And his severed head put on display


Nothin’ fair in this world

Hey little Stark boy what do you know?
Hey little Stark boy who is that ho?
Hey little Stark boy in the frying pan
Hey little Stark boy where’s your bannerman?
Hey little Stark boy crossbow

It’s a bad day to break a vow
It’s a bad day for a red wedding
It’s a bad day to break a vow


Reminds me of a song

Fire and Ice
By Robert Frost

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I’ve tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.


Who will pay this debt?

In Casterly Rock was born a man
His foulest deed was when he shoved Bran
Caught by Bolton’s men
He helped save Brienne
And for that we should give him a hand


GoT is coming

If you are a Lannister
You really know your sister
If you’re like Theon Greyjoy
Friendship is merely a ploy
If you’re more like Arya Stark
Your bite is worse than your bark
If you guard on the Night’s Watch
You vow not to use your crotch
If you lose the Game of Thrones
You’ll end up as rotting bones

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