140523

140523
Making memories for Memorial Day Weekend

Three day weekend
With my best friend
72 hours of fun
Gonna sleep late
It will be great
Already good and just begun!

140511

140511
#1 Mom

I have the world’s best mother
She cooks meals like no other
She keeps a spick-and-span house
She cleans with nary a grouse
Always time to fix a mess
Every task is a success
I have the world’s best mother
I love her like no other

140505

140505
I think your body is heavenly

A billion stars up in the sky
They leave bright trails as they go by
Like ripples forming on a pond
To infinity and beyond

140413

140413
I like Jean’s butt and I cannot lie

It’s my mission – my duty
To illustrate your beauty
You’re a cutie patootie
With a very fine booty
I am extremely lucky
To call you my Sweetie Pea
My love to the nth degree
You are everything to me

140213

140213
Happy singles appreciation day

Don’t you worry, never fear
Valentine’s is almost here
The one day you love to hate
‘Cause you do not have a mate
Even though you went on match
You still have an itch to scratch
Now the hour’s getting late
So you sadly masturbate

1212

1212
12/12/09 Mr. & Mrs. Geraghty

It was four years ago
Beneath the neon glow
Of a near-freezing sign
We became yours and mine
Your friends joined my wolf pack
We have each other’s back
The best day of my life
When you became my wife
I’ll fix it whatever
I’ll follow wherever
I’ll do it whenever
I’ll love you forever

1114

1114
Pucker up!

I want you to listen to this
When you’re not here, I reminisce
Of moments when I get to kiss
Your lips that bring me so much bliss

1109

1109
One ring to rule them all

There’s something special ’bout a ring
They’re more than a symbolic thing
You give one to say “I love you”
You get one, and you say “I do”
It can bestow mighty powers
A gold band changes mine to ours
A wedding ring proves nothing more
Than you’re with the one you adore

1107

1107
I just call out your name

When I’m wearing a frown
You turn it upside down
If I feel sad or blue
You’re the one I turn to
If my spirits are low
It’s to you that I go
Upon you I depend
You’re my forever friend

1013

1013
Poor Poe

Annabel Lee
By Edgar Allan Poe

It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of Annabel Lee;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea,
But we loved with a love that was more than love—
I and my Annabel Lee—
With a love that the wingèd seraphs of Heaven
Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsmen came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.

The angels, not half so happy in Heaven,
Went envying her and me—
Yes!—that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we—
Of many far wiser than we—
And neither the angels in Heaven above
Nor the demons down under the sea
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;

For the moon never beams, without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise, but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling—my darling—my life and my bride,
In her sepulchre there by the sea—
In her tomb by the sounding sea.

0914

0914
Netlingo Haiku

OMG HB
ROFLMAO
143 SP

OMG = Oh My God!
HB = Honey Bunny
ROFLMAO = Rolling On Floor Laughing My Ass Off
143 = I Love You (1 Letter, 4 Letters, 3 Letters)
SP = Sweetie Pea

0909

0909
9/9 is pretty fine

Happy birthday to me
I love sweetie pea
I’m twice twenty-three
Happy birthday to me

0903

0903
Make love not war

Bashar al-Assad is an ass
Especially if he used gas
But I emphatically implore
Obama – do not go to war!

0811

0811
My hats are my proems

To My Wife – With A Copy Of My Poems
By Oscar Wilde

I can write no stately proem
As a prelude to my lay;
From a poet to a poem
I would dare to say.

For if of these fallen petals
One to you seem fair,
Love will waft it till it settles
On your hair.

And when wind and winter harden
All the loveless land,
It will whisper of the garden,
You will understand.

0808

0808
Get down make love

I really miss Queen
You know what I mean?
Brian May’s smart licks
Roger Taylor’s sticks
Deacon was steady
Damn, I miss Freddie

0718

0718
Who is your one?

One person can be your crutch
One person has the right touch
One person can be so clutch
One person can mean that much

0616

0616
Happy Father’s Day too

Oh, Call it by some better name
By Thomas Moore

Oh, call it by some better name,
For Friendship sounds too cold,
While Love is now a worldly flame,
Whose shrine must be of gold:
And Passion, like the sun at noon,
That burns o’er all he sees,
Awhile as warm will set as soon–
Then call it none of these.

Imagine something purer far,
More free from stain of clay
Than Friendship, Love, or Passion are,
Yet human, still as they:
And if thy lip, for love like this,
No mortal word can frame,
Go, ask of angels what it is,
And call it by that name!

0605

0605
Happy birthday Sweetie Pea

Happy birthday to the amazing Jean
The sexiest woman I’ve ever seen
Not only pretty, she’s funny and smart
I knew she was a keeper from the start
Our weekends together should never end
I couldn’t ask for a better best friend

0512

0512
Happy Mother’s Day

M-O-T-H-E-R
By Howard Johnson

I’ve been around the world, you bet, but never went to school
Hard knocks are all I seem to get, perhaps I’ve been a fool;
But still, some educated folks, supposed to be so swell,
Would fail if they were called upon a simple word to spell.
Now if you’d like to put me to the test,
There’s one dear name that I can spell the best!

“M” is for the million things she gave me
“O” means only that she’s growing old
“T” is for the tears she shed to save me
“H” is for her heart of purest gold
“E” is for her eyes with love-light shining
“R” means right and right she’ll always be
Put them all together they spell MOTHER,

a word that means the world to me.

When I was but a baby, long before I learned to walk,
While lying in my cradle, I would try my best to talk;
It wasn’t long before I spoke and all the neighbors heard,
My folks were very proud of me for “Mother” was the word.
Although I’ll never lay a claim to fame,
I’m satisfied that I can spell the name:

“M” is for the mercy she possesses
“O” means that I owe her all I own
“T” is for her tender, sweet caresses
“H” is for her hands that made a home
“E” means ev’rything she’s done to help me
“R” means real and regular, you see
Put them all together they spell MOTHER,

a word that means the world to me.

0420

0420
I <3 Mom & Dad

Happy Anniversary Dad and Mom
You’ve been married for 47 years
You did a good job with me, James and Tom
Seeing us through good times, blood, sweat and tears
Buena Park was a good place to raise boys
The schools were good, and the crime wasn’t bad
We had enough food; we had enough toys
We had enough love, so thanks Mom and Dad!

0417

0417
Check your sources!

CNN – “They got the guy!”
“Oopsie, that might be a lie”
Is it so hard to check facts?
You look like a bunch of hacks
False hope while nerves are fraying
Journalists have a saying
“If your mom says she loves you
Check your sources through and through”

0331

0331
Póg mo thóin sassenach

Easter, 1916
By William Butler Yeats

I have met them at close of day
Coming with vivid faces
From counter or desk among grey
Eighteenth-century houses.
I have passed with a nod of the head
Or polite meaningless words,
Or have lingered awhile and said
Polite meaningless words,
And thought before I had done
Of a mocking tale or a gibe
To please a companion
Around the fire at the club,
Being certain that they and I
But lived where motley is worn:
All changed, changed utterly:
A terrible beauty is born.

That woman’s days were spent
In ignorant good-will,
Her nights in argument
Until her voice grew shrill.
What voice more sweet than hers
When, young and beautiful,
She rode to harriers?
This man had kept a school
And rode our wingèd horse;
This other his helper and friend
Was coming into his force;
He might have won fame in the end,
So sensitive his nature seemed,
So daring and sweet his thought.
This other man I had dreamed
A drunken, vainglorious lout.
He had done most bitter wrong
To some who are near my heart,
Yet I number him in the song;
He, too, has resigned his part
In the casual comedy;
He, too, has been changed in his turn,
Transformed utterly:
A terrible beauty is born.

Hearts with one purpose alone
Through summer and winter seem
Enchanted to a stone
To trouble the living stream.
The horse that comes from the road,
The rider, the birds that range
From cloud to tumbling cloud,
Minute by minute they change;
A shadow of cloud on the stream
Changes minute by minute;
A horse-hoof slides on the brim,
And a horse plashes within it;
The long-legged moor-hens dive,
And hens to moor-cocks call;
Minute by minute they live:
The stone’s in the midst of all.

Too long a sacrifice
Can make a stone of the heart.
O when may it suffice?
That is Heaven’s part, our part
To murmur name upon name,
As a mother names her child
When sleep at last has come
On limbs that had run wild.
What is it but nightfall?
No, no, not night but death;
Was it needless death after all?
For England may keep faith
For all that is done and said.
We know their dream; enough
To know they dreamed and are dead;
And what if excess of love
Bewildered them till they died?
I write it out in a verse—
MacDonagh and MacBride
And Connolly and Pearse
Now and in time to be,
Wherever green is worn,
Are changed, changed utterly:
A terrible beauty is born.

0327

0327
DOMA is dumb

We’re close, but right wing whackos need a shove
Why does marriage need to be defended?
If everyone could marry who they love
I can’t think of anything more splendid

0326

0326
Hoping sanity prevails

If you’re against marriage equality
How big an asshole do you need to be?
The supreme Court will make a decision
I hope they choose love over division

0224

0224
Was his first name Tom?

She Walks in Beauty
By Lord Byron

She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes;
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
Or softly lightens o’er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express,
How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent!

0217

0217
inside my thoracic cavity

i carry your heart
by e.e. cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

0216

0216
CrazyBlindHaiku.com

One day you’re not whole
Then you go on a blind date
Next day you’re complete

0214

0214
By kitty I mean…

There once was a girl with one titty
She was smart and funny and pretty
She had a blind date
And found her next mate
She liked him, and he liked her kitty

0210

0210
What a beautiful pussy

The Owl And The Pussy-Cat
By Edward Lear

I
The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea
In a beautiful pea green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
‘O lovely Pussy! O Pussy my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are!’

II
Pussy said to the Owl, ‘You elegant fowl!
How charmingly sweet you sing!
O let us be married! too long we have tarried:
But what shall we do for a ring?’
They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the Bong-tree grows
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood
With a ring at the end of his nose,
His nose,
His nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose.

III
‘Dear pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling
Your ring?’Said the Piggy,’I will.’
So they took it away, and were married next day
By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince, and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a runcible spoon;
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,
They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.

0203

0203
I luve Jean

A Red, Red Rose
By Robert Burns

O my Luve’s like a red, red rose
That’s newly sprung in June;
O my Luve’s like the melodie
That’s sweetly played in tune.

As fair art thou, my bonnie lass,
So deep in luve am I;
And I will luve thee still, my dear,
Till a’ the seas gang dry:

Till a’ the seas gang dry, my dear,
And the rocks melt wi’ the sun;
I will luve thee still, my dear,
While the sands o’ life shall run.

And fare thee weel, my only Luve,
And fare thee weel awhile!
And I will come again, my Luve,
Tho’ it ware ten thousand mile.

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