140819
Also a fox!
We saw a cougar at Lake Quinault
On the north shore road without asphalt
We viewed from afar
Inside our safe car
We’ll store that in out memory vault
Author: tkpope
140817
140817
Portland’s hangover cure
We got six donuts from Voodoo
First we ate one to break our fast
We had our second for lunch too
Then for dessert we ate the last
140815
140815
San Francisco Bay Blues
Last night at the Stick, we saw Paul
Beatles and Wings – he played it all
From Blackbird to Band on the Run
Jean and I had a lot of fun
Let it Be and Live and Let Die
So awesome we were Hi, Hi, Hi
Maybe I’m Amazed, but I’ll say
That was fucking great Yesterday
140813
140813
North bound and down
We’re driving to Canada and back
Our clothes are crammed into a knapsack
At 5 o’clock I left the station
That’s when we started our vacation
140811
140809
140809
Blame it on the guy before
Have you ever smelled a smell
Like some demon dark and fell?
Did a vulture die in here?
This might linger for a year
Like an abattoir of death
Worse than garlic, onion breath
I think it was chorizo
That made the bathroom smell so
140807
140807
Let’s burn Atlanta just to be safe
As frightening as the Ayatollah
A dude in Atlanta has Ebola
The CDC has this man in a bed
Like the beginning of The Walking Dead
While they do their best to stop the outbreak
It’s hard to be sure the threat’s real or fake
I don’t know if it’s the end or prologue
But I’m getting a crossbow and a hog
140805
140805
Hoochie mama is not dressing for success
Don’t wear that for your interview
I shouldn’t see that much of you
I’m trying not to be a grouch
But comfy does not mean to slouch
The kids these days just blow my mind
You’d think that jobs aren’t hard to find
There’s not a lot of work out there
So do a little to prepare
140803
140803
Bobcats, turkeys and deer, oh my!
Playing games and watching bands
Hiking over arid lands
Stalking bobcats through the trees
Enjoying a gentle breeze
Watching movies with my gal
Helps to improve my morale
Though we try to make them last
Weekends go by much too fast
140801
140801
Liars? Lawyers? What’s the difference?
The GOP is causing drama
They think that they can sue Obama
For not enforcing Obamacare
A bill they don’t even think is fair
I can’t believe the hypocrisy
This only proves liars run DC
140731
140731
We don’t own a calendar
When you’re in a relationship
You have to make some time to play
So grab your partner by the hip
Wednesday’s not the only hump day
140729
140729
Never a kerfuffle
Without naming names
We’re a bunch of fools
We tried learning games
By reading the rules
T’was a total botch
You know we blew it
‘Cause we didn’t watch
Rahdo Runs Through it
140727
140727
We did not play Constantinople
Lorna is this woman I know
Who I met 30 years ago
She came to town the other day
To find some new board games to play
So Lorna, Marc, and Natalie
Played Istanbul with Jean and me
Then we drove to Captain Nemo’s
The card game Gloom is what she chose
I picked up Basic D&D
Then we ate dinner by the sea
We all had a fantastic day
Can’t wait for the next game to play
140725
140725
Aw, it’s you. I never knew.
I met her at a coffee shop
I didn’t want the date to stop
So we went out to a movie
Then the date got pretty groovy
Out to a bar for drinks and dance
Could feel the starting of romance
I dropped her off and bid adieu
Then realized “that’s my place too!”
140723
140723
Two less lonely people
It was six years ago tonight
We met, and Jean was out of sight!
Set up on a crazy blind date
Neither knew that it would be great
She’s the kind of woman, you know
That you grab, and you don’t let go
The kind you can’t stop thinking of
Six years gone, and I’m still in love
140721
140721
Be true to yourself
After years of fighting the fight
Obama has made it a right
What was wrong has been corrected
Trans people are now protected
Homophobes are able to hate
But they cannot discriminate
Foes can laugh and think it’s funny
But they won’t get federal money
Dicks can hate and act like a jerk
But they just can’t do it at work
140719
140719
We partied hearty
I don’t mind cleaning
When the party’s done
I can’t stop leaning
It must have been fun
140717
140717
Holy stupid limerick
There once was a hero named Batman
His enemy Penguin’s a fat man
The rotund bad guy
Tried stealing a pie
But the Dark Knight prevented that plan
140715
140715
Stuck in the bathroom
The door is s’posed to slide
But rarely does it glide
I don’t like to be stuck
When I’m on the inside
It’s something with the wheel
It must be budget steel
I mean like what the fuck?
I’m over this ordeal
140713
140713
Proud to be an ally
We are LGBT allies
We don’t do it to win a prize
We do it ’cause it’s right to do
Equality is overdue
140711
140711
This lantern doth the horned moon present
Tonight there’s a full moon
It’s the first one since June
Look up and be surprised
This time it’s super sized
It did not increase its girth
It’s just closer to Earth
140709
140709
Holy Geritol Batman
Here’s something that ain’t no jive
Batman is seventy-five
Gordon’s been flashing the sign
Going back to ’39
The World’s Greatest Detective
Has been pretty effective
Diminishing Gotham’s crime
Even though from time to time
A two-bit hood like Two-Face
Makes Bats look like a disgrace
Then Robin will stop the gang
By throwing his batarang
Batman’s Bruce and Robin’ Dick
Make this duo dynamic
140707
140707
Don’t drive angry
Common in this day and age
I might suffer from road rage
What’s the fuss? Let me explain
You shouldn’t be in my lane
Screw you, you little stinker
You didn’t use your blinker
First, you’re gonna hear my horn
Then, you’re gonna feel my scorn
If my anger should linger
I will show you my finger
You should quickly drive away
Since you’ve ruined my whole day
140705
140705
At least they’re super cute
I was clean, but now I’m not
Brownie sneezed, and out came snot
Raven covered me with fur
Linc just likes to knead and purr
While he drenches me with drool
Having pets makes me a fool
140703
140703
Double double animal style
When meeting a friend from Facebook
That you only know from online
Go to where they know how to cook
And take pics in front of their sign
140701
140701
And he has a wiggle butt
Brownie’s head is quite immense
And it’s also pretty dense
Plus he really likes to chew
At least his heart is big too
140629
140629
I treasure the junk of others
Scary cat clowns at the thrift store
Next to medals from the gulf war
Get an 8-track with eight speakers
Or a track suit with red sneakers
At one time these were a good buy
Now they’re only fit for good bye
Though you want to purchase something
Most of this stuff’s good for nothing
140627
140627
I have a dumb green thumb
Last night we planted some trees
A new place for birds and bees
To make a home or sight see
Tonight we planted again
Because our dogs are a pain
They had uprooted a tree
Tomorrow we’ll run away
While the dogs will have to stay
And plot their next digging spree
140625
140625
He needs to Kim Jong Chill
Because of Franco and Rogen
The world might go to war again
“The Interview” is coming soon
In which they murder Kim Jong Un
He’s accusing them of terror
I think his critique’s in error
I guess his humor has no sense
Because he’s threatened our defense
If he’s no fan of comedy
I wonder what he’d do to me
140623
140623
Wet spot
Before you go to bed
To get your forty winks
You have to plan ahead
Don’t have so many drinks
If you indulge too much
You won’t have restful bliss
You’ll toss and turn and such
Because you have to piss
Your bladder starts to ache
You stumble to the john
Not totally awake
You leave your undies on
You can’t hold back the sea
The liquid must expel
So now you’re soaked with pee
And wide awake as well
