{"id":2217,"date":"2016-12-02T10:54:52","date_gmt":"2016-12-02T18:54:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/?p=2217"},"modified":"2017-09-07T11:12:50","modified_gmt":"2017-09-07T18:12:50","slug":"161202","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/2016\/12\/02\/161202\/","title":{"rendered":"161202"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone\" src=\"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/images\/2016\/161202.png\" \/><\/p>\n<p>161202<br \/>\nExpress lane &#8211; twelve ounces or less<\/p>\n<p>Buying dog food at Costco<br \/>\nSuddenly I had to go<br \/>\nEvery line was ten carts deep<br \/>\n&#8216;Twas a sea of shopping sheep<br \/>\nSince the dog food was on sale<br \/>\nI decided not to bail<br \/>\nStood in line behind a nun<br \/>\nBladder full with number one<br \/>\nShe asked me to hold her tote<br \/>\nAs my teeth began to float<br \/>\nNun was done; my turn to pay<br \/>\nFighting back the urge to spray<br \/>\nPaid and flew to the bathroom<br \/>\nDropped my pants; opened the flume<br \/>\nYellow was all I could see<br \/>\nWow, I really had to pee!<\/p>\n<button id=\"listenButton1\" class=\"responsivevoice-button\" type=\"button\" value=\"Play\" title=\"ResponsiveVoice Tap to Start\/Stop Speech\"><span>&#128266; Listen to Poem<\/span><\/button>\n        <script>\n            listenButton1.onclick = function(){\n                if(responsiveVoice.isPlaying()){\n                    responsiveVoice.cancel();\n                }else{\n                    responsiveVoice.speak(\"161202 Express lane - twelve ounces or less Buying dog food at Costco Suddenly I had to go Every line was ten carts deep \\'Twas a sea of shopping sheep Since the dog food was on sale I decided not to bail Stood in line behind a nun Bladder full with number one She asked me to hold her tote As my teeth began to float Nun was done; my turn to pay Fighting back the urge to spray Paid and flew to the bathroom Dropped my pants; opened the flume Yellow was all I could see Wow, I really had to pee!\", \"UK English Male\");\n                }\n            };\n        <\/script>\n    \n\n<div class=\"twitter-share\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?via=stickpersonpoet\" class=\"twitter-share-button\">Tweet<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>161202 Express lane &#8211; twelve ounces or less Buying dog food at Costco Suddenly I had to go Every line was ten carts deep &#8216;Twas a sea of shopping sheep Since the dog food was on sale I decided not to bail Stood in line behind a nun Bladder full with number one She asked &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/2016\/12\/02\/161202\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">161202<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[49,90],"class_list":["post-2217","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-rhymes","tag-bathroom","tag-colors"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2217"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2217"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2217\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2218,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2217\/revisions\/2218"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2217"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2217"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2217"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}