{"id":1813,"date":"2016-08-10T15:26:17","date_gmt":"2016-08-10T22:26:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/?p=1813"},"modified":"2017-09-06T15:21:41","modified_gmt":"2017-09-06T22:21:41","slug":"160810","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/2016\/08\/10\/160810\/","title":{"rendered":"160810"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone\" src=\"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/images\/2016\/160810.png\" \/><\/p>\n<p>160810<br \/>\nNext time I&#8217;ll call pizza slut<\/p>\n<p>The dogs are fed, the cat is too<br \/>\nNow it&#8217;s my turn to have a chew<br \/>\nBut Jean is gone, I&#8217;m on my own<br \/>\nMy stomach growls, I start to moan<br \/>\nI look around for food to nuke<br \/>\nThe leftovers all look like puke<br \/>\nSo I decide to cook from scratch<br \/>\nI gather wood, and strike a match<br \/>\nI fill a pot, and start to boil<br \/>\nI grease the pan with olive oil<br \/>\nI marinate the meat in sauce<br \/>\nI chiffonade like I&#8217;m a boss<br \/>\nI bake spring rolls as an hors d&#8217;oeuvre<br \/>\nThen right before I start to serve<br \/>\nMy eyes open, I&#8217;m on the floor<br \/>\nMy head had banged the freezer door<br \/>\nMy night as chef was just a dream<br \/>\nI settle for melted ice cream<\/p>\n<button id=\"listenButton1\" class=\"responsivevoice-button\" type=\"button\" value=\"Play\" title=\"ResponsiveVoice Tap to Start\/Stop Speech\"><span>&#128266; Listen to Poem<\/span><\/button>\n        <script>\n            listenButton1.onclick = function(){\n                if(responsiveVoice.isPlaying()){\n                    responsiveVoice.cancel();\n                }else{\n                    responsiveVoice.speak(\"160810 Next time I\\'ll call pizza slut The dogs are fed, the cat is too Now it\\'s my turn to have a chew But Jean is gone, I\\'m on my own My stomach growls, I start to moan I look around for food to nuke The leftovers all look like puke So I decide to cook from scratch I gather wood, and strike a match I fill a pot, and start to boil I grease the pan with olive oil I marinate the meat in sauce I chiffonade like I\\'m a boss I bake spring rolls as an hors d\\'oeuvre Then right before I start to serve My eyes open, I\\'m on the floor My head had banged the freezer door My night as chef was just a dream I settle for melted ice cream\", \"UK English Male\");\n                }\n            };\n        <\/script>\n    \n\n<div class=\"twitter-share\"><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?via=stickpersonpoet\" class=\"twitter-share-button\">Tweet<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>160810 Next time I&#8217;ll call pizza slut The dogs are fed, the cat is too Now it&#8217;s my turn to have a chew But Jean is gone, I&#8217;m on my own My stomach growls, I start to moan I look around for food to nuke The leftovers all look like puke So I decide to &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/2016\/08\/10\/160810\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">160810<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[40,96,53,72,7,8,9],"class_list":["post-1813","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-rhymes","tag-brownie","tag-door","tag-food","tag-home","tag-jean","tag-linc","tag-raven"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1813"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1813"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1813\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1890,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1813\/revisions\/1890"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1813"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1813"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stickpersonpoetry.com\/spp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1813"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}